Thought #1 – If we don’t actually use all of our brain, what does it do all day long?
Thought #2 – Whose idea was it to create the penny, anyway? All we ever do is lose them under seat cushions, or hide them in our car consoles with all the lint, hair, and sticky candy wrappers.
Thought #3 – I want to live in one of those Tiny Homes, with lots of little nooks and recessed windows for growing plants.
Thought #4 – I wonder what my soon-to-arrive grand daughter will look like?
Thought #5 – Wouldn’t things be different if all conflict resolution had to be done while everybody lays with their head on each others stomachs, like we did as kids? All it takes is one tiny giggle, and then the peace talks can begin!
Thought #6 – What if politicians had to do their whole campaign in Pig Latin?
Thought #7 – If the heart is simply an organ used for pumping blood, why does it feel physical pain from emotional hurt? Or, why does the heart flutter and skip all over the place, from just one kiss?
Thought #8 – If love is supposed to be free, why does it cost so much?
Thought #9 – If I laugh at my own jokes, do I still need an audience?
Thought #10 – Lack of gluten and lactose has to be the cause of most wars in one way or another, I think.
Thought #11 – I have to come up with 4 more thoughts, without being irritable.
Thought #12 – My oatmeal won’t make itself, will it? I didn’t think so.
Thought #13 – The pumpkin fields are bursting with color, right now. While they’ve a ways yet to go, their bright orange color can already be seen from the highway.
Thought #14 – I can’t believe that Creed is nearly done with his degree! Only one class left, I think.
Thought #15 – I’m so glad that God captures all of our tears, only to replace them with oceans of His love!
As the old adage states, if it isn’t broken, don’t fix it! Since last year’s response to this question hasn’t changed, I’ve opted to pull it up from the archives. Have a blessed day!
While I often write of my desire to do good for those around me, I feel fairly confident that I’ve also mentioned how much I desire to go home. No, this isn’t a cry for help, so relax! I’m speaking of my heavenly home, that’s all. I haven’t felt apart of this world for so long, it’s become rather easy not to dream of things of this life… only that which is to come!
If I sat here all day, thinking on all the empty hours and solitude that I exist within, I guarantee you that there would be no peace available to partake in.
This world is vicious, selfish, petty, cruel, and vindictive! If I only focus on the backbiting, slanderous and nefarious villains loitering on every corner… again, I’d have no peace!
If I wasted all my time dwelling on every mistake, failure and sin that I’ve ever committed… also, no peace!
I’m simply being wholeheartedly honest, in regards to the prompt. I really really do want to go home! I’m tired! I exhausted myself with wasted efforts at being a friend, sister, mother and all around good person, and I was far too tired to have any amount of peace! Trust me… I’ve tried all that!
Now, I’m following God wherever He leads! I know my heavenly home will be there, ready to receive me when I’ve fulfilled whatever purpose I was born to do. No, I don’t really have a clear picture what that purpose is, but as I remain in the word and dwell constantly beneath the shadow of my Father… He is what brings me peace!
Now, I’m certain that you were expecting wax poetic over my prayer life, studying the word of God, and/or the incredible love of Jesus Christ… but, I think I do that already. This morning, I opted for something different!
So, in all seriousness, when IBS decided to have a field day with me nearly two months ago… oatmeal has been my life’s blood!
After things were said and done, they kind of just sent me home with a sack of medications. Apparently, I would be on my own from that point, as they didn’t seem bothered by the results from my two procedures. That’s the beauty of IBS… it won’t kill me, but it will never go away.
I had to start at the bottom of my health pile, sifting through every single detail of my own body’s struggle with foods, stress, trauma, poverty, and circumstantial solitude. I shall have to walk this path alone, as far as doctors are concerned. I’ve come to peace with the 4 medications I’ll be taking from now on, as none of them effect the brain. My spirit and emotional health belong to God, and him alone.
This is where my joy of oatmeal arrives… it’s the single thing to eat each day that doesn’t hurt! Even with the removal of caffeine, gluten, and lactose products, I’m still far from home on the IBS Safari Tours!
I’ve adopted an intermittent fasting lifestyle, somewhat. Though the schedule allows for me to consume calories for up to an 8 hour stretch, my body only seems to be happy with eating between noon and 5 o’clock. Part of the issue comes from all the medications I use throughout the day to coat my stomach and intestines. I have to take them 4 times a day in order to eat, and there’s time restrictions for before and after each dose. 5 hours is easier to work with, truth be told.
Why is 5 hours easier, you ask? Because, my roommate IBS tends to lose all trust in my ability to feed myself when she gets upset… always has and always will! No matter how my mind copes with stress and trauma, IBS will always have her day in court, so to speak.
Thankfully, she readily accepts the oatmeal with a tablespoon of brown sugar and a bit of Oat Milk. Work with what you got… and I got oatmeal, baby!
I’ve come to discover, in my older years, how the health and medical systems function… if you don’t have a hole in you somewhere that isn’t fixed with duct tape, don’t bother asking a doctor! All they seem to be capable of doing these days is either sewing things shut, or stuffing pills in your face!
I am exhausted with doctors telling me they see a problem… but it’s just not bad enough to fix… yet! They want me to just wait it out, I guess.
This last 8 weeks have been somewhat of a nightmare for me, if I’m to be fully honest everyone. Not only did my stomach decide to camp with the enemy, but I had to suffer the indignity of both a colonoscopy and an endoscopy and a CAT scan, along with existing off of oatmeal and rice the entire time. What did they discover, you might be asking? With very little concern from the doctor, he found lesions on my liver, a small hernia below my esophagus and a few other apparently insignificant findings.
Here I sit, a week out from the last two procedures, in the same place I’d been in when I sought help in the first place! Just a large amount of shoulder shrugs… thank you so much for all the probing, sticking, and false empathy… makes me want to throw up in my mouth just a bit!
So, with that, I’m back to my DIY, FIY, and LGALG routine… I dare you to try and figure out the last set of initials stand for!
Basically, I’ve had to become what I dub as a slutty vegan! I’ve had to come up with my own version of nutrition, as well as, manage my own pain, which kinda sucks if you can’t take any NSAIDs by mouth. Absolutely everything I need for my body has to come from foods, and the list of what I can even tolerate has come to be very limited. This is the slutty vegan part!
I can have herbal tea, I can drink oat milk in small quantities, and I can eat a decent number of raw or frozen vegetables and fruits, as long as I’m careful. Certain things with too much fiber, or sugars in them really causes difficulties.
No more coffee, caffeine of any kind, chocolate, gluten, lactose, and a sleugh of other items that I’m to tired to list!
Pretty much everything has to be plant based, yay me! I can tolerate a little bit of egg, and chicken doesn’t bother me so this is my slutty compromise to this ridiculous food circus merry-go-round!
You can’t blame me for the overshare bit! Blame WordPress for asking me such a question. They’re just lucky they didn’t lose a finger or something.
Everyone knows not to poke a hungry bear…
Well, you better start eating this stuff cause I can’t, and I’m getting hungry just looking at it!
When I was pregnant with each of my daughters, I counted each and every day…
Don’t ask me about dieting because I counted each and every calorie til I broke down and binged… Don’t judge!
The point is, most of my activities through the years did nothing to help me lose track of time. But, since you’re already here I’ve decided to put my thinking cap on. I want to try and make you lose track of time.
Honestly, I only had to think on it for a moment! Three things immediately came to mind that I’m certain will satisfy today’s prompt.
Sleep has a two-fold bonus to it, when it comes to losing track of time. There will be times when I wake feeling like I’d only just closed my eyes. And, I’m fairly certain that I slept in the same position throughout the night.
Then, there will be those nights spent dreaming of beautiful and wondrous places. You know what dreams I speak of, don’t you. They’re the ones so fantastical that they couldn’t be real. Those are the dreams that make you want to fall back asleep, unsuccessfully attempting to revisit the dream. In futility, you strive to seek the place you’d just left off, before dawn had so rudely disturbed your slumber.
While I may not have mastered the art of revisiting a recent dream, there are many of my dreams that revisit me from years past. Sometimes, I can’t remember if they were dreams, or memories. It’s strange, but I can recall the first time I dreamt each of them. I can’t recall my first love, nor any of my childhood teachers, but I can tell you exactly when and where each dream began. Isn’t one’s memory such a tricky thing? Whether it be a dream or a memory, the emotions I felt back then are just as real to me now, as they were the first time…
Now that I went and got all nostalgic on you, it’s pretty clear to see why sleep is my favorite time burner! What would the world look like without sleep? That’s where dreams are made! I can’t imagine what the world might be like without dreams, can you?
Yeesh! I don’t want to think about that possibility… how depressing would that be? Whatever we do, let’s never stop dreaming!
Currently, I’m laying low and allowing my system some serious down time, if that makes any sense. I realize that I said body heal thy self, but it’s a bit more than that. While my mode wishes it to be so, I’ve placed myself in the hands of a rather competent physician, opting for a compromise in the “do it myself” department.
Careful selection of medications paired with a radical change in diet should hopefully allow my body to do some internal repair and restoration. I’d like to say that I was an iron clad warrior through our little sojourn in the wilderness, but it wasn’t exactly like that. Sadly, no muscle bound wild woman roared out of the darkness, but rather, a very exhausted, sick, and humble grandmother of six literally limped into this apartment. Can you believe it’s been two months already? Well, something like that… I’ve honestly lost track of time.
One of the medications I’m currently on is used for repairing the lining of my stomach. It must be taken four times a day for at least a month, possibly longer. The struggle has been to take the prescribed four doses without eating for several hours on either side of each dose. Add to that, my diet now restricts lactose, gluten, and…………… caffeine! Nooooooooooooooooooooo!
Yes!
It’s actually not so bad, now that I’m used to decaf with non-dairy creamer mixed with oat milk. So far, so good, right?!
This last rough patch simply took more out of me than I wanted to admit. My mom had several strokes, a heart attack, due to both a history of high cholesterol and high blood pressure. She was also a diabetic. The woman oozed bad health for the entirety of her life, eventually passing from Dementia. This last set of bloodwork really made me pay attention to this history. I did a bunch of reading on the relationship between cholesterol and blood pressure, and I don’t want to follow my mother’s health journey. I’ve got a new grandbaby due in November, you guys. I need to be on deck!
So, until things start going in the right direction, health wise, I focus on nothing more than sleep, medication, reading, working on my final read through of a manuscript, and eating like a bird. Honestly, I don’t even mind eating sparsely right now, what with all that medication in my stomach. Not much of anything sounds good, aside from oatmeal and bananas.
The good side of this seclusion is that my imagination is on fire!
I’ve been thoroughly enjoying myself with adventures on the high seas, along with wrapping up this first novel. It’s time to begin the second volume. What better way to prep for it than to read the first story again, so it’s fresh in my mind.
Just because I’m turning lemons into lemonade Wiwohka style, it doesn’t mean that I’d recommend such a radical shift in lifestyle to anyone. This has been my modes operandum for a lifetime… feast or famine… highs and lows… joy and grief! Nothing in life worth having comes without cost, nor can we always have what we want without the cost taking it’s toll. I wanted to smoke cigarettes’ as a kid and it took me 40 years to quit! I wanted children and lost five babies in the attempt to bear the three beautiful girls I’ve got! I wanted my freedom from my first husband and it cost me the relationships I had with all three of my children! So many lessons in life have taught me how entwined the good is with the bad. No matter how hard we try, we cannot seem to have one without the other.
How I’m feeling this morning can be summed up in the video below. The song is called Maybe It’s Ok, by We Are Messengers:
I shall be quite transparent for this next bit…
Currently, this child’s body is somewhat broken inside both medically and emotionally. Never fear though, as my spirit is stronger than ever… well, it’s His spirit that brings this girl so much strength. I did say that I was going to be very honest about things.
Our time in the wilderness, so to speak, has taken a bit more out of me than I’d first thought. What I’d assumed was just my IBS trying to readjust to things, has become something else. Now, it’s possibly just my ability to handle my health on my own any longer, which is where the emotional turmoil is coming from. I went down this route before and it didn’t end well… hence, the last 4 years of self-care. It hasn’t helped that nobody seems that concerned about my survival aside from God and my husband.
That is until this new doctor!
Not only did she surprise me with prayer during our first visit, but I think she actually listened to the words I spoke… I mean really heard me! And, she took the time to follow all of my test results, adjusting and selecting my meds and treatment. The downside to this new kind of medical care is that I can’t get away with anything. This means taking medications that are no longer an option… they are required! The first is a medication for my Cholesterol, which is off the charts, and has been for years. It doesn’t even matter if I eat like a bird… oh yeah, I already do! No change! The other is for my blood pressure, as it has gone off the reservation and it won’t come back down. That too has been something I was withholding from the doctor… that is, until recently.
In the last month my health has been systematically shutting down, in areas that I really kind of need. Well, I’ll need em if I’m to bring these stories to the little ones they’re meant for, ya know?! Little ones aside, I’m not done baking cookies… not in the slightest!
I’ve been writing on this blog steadily for nearly three years of this journey through the wilderness, and I’m not about to get to the gates of the Cities of Men, just to drop dead of exhaustion… and I don’t believe it’s God’s plan for me, either! I still believe that God led me to WordPress so that I could find you… each and every one of you!
Why?
Honestly, the answer will be different for each of you, as we’ve all grown closer together in different ways, and for different reasons. I know some of you better than others, but care for each and every soul that enters this lobby! I love you with the love of my God, my Savior, and the Holy Spirit that dwells in this vessel. Why else do you think I share so much with you, try to make you laugh, seek to make you think, and challenge you to eat my cookies? It’s love…
I know that most of my subscribers are adults, though I often write of adventures requiring you to find your inner child… so why do I do it?
Why don’t I write deep and passionate poetry?
Why not great theological teachings that might impress?
Why on earth do I always make you leave reality and push the boundaries of truth and/or fiction?
What’s in those cookies I feed you guys, anyways?
Some of you may think that I’m just a Jesus Freak that’s trying to shove God flavored cookies down your throats… well, ok, you got me there!
Some of you may think that I’m an oversharer lookin for sympathy andl/or attention. In truth… if that’s all you’ve seen then you should start reading between all those lines, friends. There’s so much more there…
Face it guys and gals, WordPress has become my family! With that being said and understood clearly, here, right now, it’s time we all start acting like it! I’ve been asking myself, of late, why I haven’t wanted to write for my family? Honestly, sometimes it feels like if I don’t give you something juicy and exciting (usually my journey junk)… I get nothin!
Now, before you start thinking that this is going to be another one of those articles complaining about a lack of likes, shares, and follows… stop it!
You come to this table as a family member… not a subscriber or follower, savvy?!
As a family, we are having a discussion about family dynamics, if that’s alright with everyone at the table. Do family members take the time to call or write each other, or do they just mail each other a gold star? As I’m just as guilty as you are, in this respect, let’s start making some healthy changes, here in the lobby. If you are busy, or not in the mood, don’t feel pressured to visit or leave me that gold star. It’s not like I get any money for it… it simply lets me know that you stopped by. If you do stop in and read, possibly grabbing a cookie, try leaving me a message, as well. Here’s the crazy part… your comment doesn’t have to have ANYTHING to do with what I wrote. Instead, try things like, “Hey, how are you?” or “I saw something the other day that made me think of you”. One of you actually wrote this to me, not too long ago… thank you, love.
There is nothing in the WordPress bylaws that states we cannot simply use the comment button to simply communicate with each other… you know, like friends and family should. Notice how I said should? Sadly, I realize that there are families that don’t do this… but honestly, it’s so very important! How else do you give love to those nearest your heart?
So, in the spirit of positivity, I am going to begin sending you messages in your comment box that may or may not have anything to do with what you wrote… ok?
No, I’m not going to try passing phone numbers or hookin up, if you get my meaning, here! I think that so often, we simply want to know that we’ve been seen, that someone noticed our passing.
If we all began seeking to give love to another, rather than seeking to receive for ourselves, wouldn’t we all become filled with needed love simply by proxy? Kind of like a happy accident or positive side effect?
When I first saw this mornings prompt I thought it was going to be a walk in the park. However, once I sat down to answer the question it became clear that it wasn’t going to be such a simple task.
You see, I don’t really know what I would give as my tagline. At first, I was going to come up with a snappy add-on to Wiwohka, but it became apparent that what I came up with wasn’t a tagline, at all! All I was getting accomplished was to give myself a rhyming last name… not what I think that the prompt was asking us. So, I did a quick check on Google for a clear definition of what a tagline actually looks like.
After looking at the examples of some taglines, I again tried to select an appropriate phrase that captures what others might think of when they hear the name Wiwohka. I’ve now sat in this chair for over an hour, going back and forth on several different ideas. Who’d of thought a WordPress prompt would cause such an uproar?
I tell stories, I bake virtual cookies, I overshare my personal business far too often, and I’m quick to talk about Jesus or the bible or God’s forgiveness or love or grace or mercy. According to the definition of tagline, the answer to the prompt shouldn’t be more than two or three words… huh? That’s entirely unfair, I think. Are they really asking me, the oversharing, novel length explanation giver, to choose only two or three words to describe myself… sheesh!
Ok, fine! Let’s give this a try…
I’m going to settle on something simple like, oh, I don’t know,
Reaching land after being at sea for such a long time can be like standing upon the sand, as the sea pulls the waters back into the depths. It feels like you’re moving while standing still, as the sand moves beneath your feet. I stand upon the shore of a new land (sort of), having nowhere to go, but forward into the unknown. It feels both exciting and confusing, as you’ve no idea what’s beyond your vision, or where the path will lead.
We’ve spent the last five years living in the same small space, climbing over one another, and putting one foot in front of the other… adrift in uncharted waters!
We’d forgotten how to live without constant and immense pressure, pushing at us from all directions; often forcing us to move fast, while leaving everything behind! When you live for so long with little on hand, you become accustomed to letting things go, and/or making due. I am a bit shocked at how much that was lost along the way to this particular shore. For goodness sake, I haven’t had a vacuum cleaner for five years, let alone a working oven, or a working toilet (that was only in the last year and a half). I guess, my point here would be that I feel a bit lost and out of sorts, when it comes to living like a normal person.
I will be taking another week off from writing, in order to focus on rest and recovery from a very costly time at sea. The physical toll it has taken on us this time has been costly, so rest and recovery are the priority, at the moment. Spring quarter will begin for my husband in less than 2 weeks, so he’s going to be getting his first taste of college without the pressure of homelessness and loss hanging over his head all the time, thank goodness! He’s nearly there, with only spring and summer left on this degree. It’s incredible how well he has done in the midst of such turmoil, and I’m so very proud of his commitment to finish… and finish well!
Me? I have another book to write, but first, it’s time to put the first one out there…
It’s time, wouldn’t you agree? If God deems it time, then I’ve no doubt that it will be done. I shall enter this new part of the journey with the grace, faith and confidence given my by my Creator, going wherever I’m called to go. I’ve always loved a good adventure, how about you?!
F.Y.I. , these new shores are quite beautiful from where I’m standing!
Sometimes, it’s the way he looks at me and smiles.
Then there are times where he doesn’t even have to smile or anything… I can see it in his eyes.
Sometimes, it’s the way he laughs at the silly things I say.
But there are still those moments when things aren’t so funny… he won’t laugh or say anything at all, really. He just rests his shoulder against mine to let me know that he’s there.
Sometimes, it’s the little things he does… like bringing me that first cup of coffee in the morning, or surprising me with my favorite candy bar. It’s not even about receiving a gift, it’s about the planning or forethought, if you will. It makes me feel so loved that he was thinking about me, even when I wasn’t with him. You know, sometimes I’ll wake up from the sensation of him tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear… he’d been lying there watching me, as I slept. Isn’t that so adorable!
I could go on and on about all the sometimes that I have felt loved… and these examples are about my husband. I haven’t even gotten to God, yet! If I could share with you all the times that I have felt God’s love, it would fill a book… oh yeah, I already did that!
Let’s just leave it at this:
With enough examples gathered together, one might say that I always feel loved! But, since it was very hard to pick just one time to tell you about, I opted for a handful of my sometimes.
Journey With Me! 