I’m makin cookies for my WordPress family, at this virtual moment, but as far as future, future plans… I’m heaven bound, my friends!
Cookies?
I’m on my way there now…
Category: Spiritual
Monday Messages…
It’s hard to have my ship up on blocks, leaving me to sit here on the beach… alone. Creed is busily working away on the ship, so I don’t wish to disturb him, and Brutus took all the babes and flew back to the barn. The big wide world is no place for them to simply wander about, what with man’s fear of anything they don’t recognize or understand.
Besides, I left some important maps back in my office desk that we’ll need, once the ship is seaworthy. Lilly knows where I keep them, so she’ll retrieve the maps along with several other things we’d left behind. Tilly wanted to visit young Henry and the rest of the babes simply wanted to go along for the dragon ride… always the adventurers, they are!
So, here I sit, all alone on the beach and wondering what to do with myself for the next several days. I don’t often spend time away from them for so long, but it’ll be good for me, right? Why do I find myself lonely? Will they miss me, at all? What if they need a break from me?
I’ve always felt like I was simply too much! Too much emotion, too loud, talks far too much, cries more than most, and lives a life that wears folks out! I crave affection far more than a person probably should, but I just miss human touch, that’s all! Watching someone’s eyes glaze over as I seek to fellowship with them is brutally painful! It happens with everyone I encounter, so it’s not new… but the pain of it is always real, fresh, and damaging.
I’ve sort of chosen to avoid engaging others now, not that there are that many to avoid. I’ve three daughters who are living their own lives, keeping me firmly placed on the outskirts of their hearts… my fault!
I’ve no church family that calls me their own… my fault!
I’ve a husband whom I love deeply, but has never even picked up a bible once, in all of our 19 years of marriage… my choice!
That was my list of obligated listeners. Not a very long list!
Fortunately, I have discovered that with God, I am never alone! He listens to my incessant chatter, my prayers, my raging, and my storytelling. He captures my tears, mends the hurt, and fills the empty! There is none that can compare, to the God who has walked with me all these years… through all the good, the bad, the hurt and the heartache. When I make mistakes, he forgives and helps me learn to grow from the lessons.
When absolutely everyone else simply shrugs their shoulders in frustration or irritation, at my cries for help or attempts at sharing my heart… He stays!
So, now you know what I’m planning to do with my time over the next few quiet days… spend it with the one who calls me His own.
Hugs
Absolute!!!!!!?????????
- Pain hurts!
- Some loves last forever… and some don’t!
- Life begins!
- Death is real!
- When a stone is cast upon the water, the ripples will always follow!
- Human kindness is divine!
- Ignorance is taught!
- The eyes are the window to the soul!
- Puppy breath is the best high!
- A babies laughter can make everything better!
Cookies?
The adventure of seeking security…
56 years of being the last one on the list, the one at the end of the line, or the stand-by friend has done it’s damage. You know what they say about the truth of things… If everyone else in the room disagrees with you, then it must be you that’s wrong. Personally, I think that adage stinks like a bag of rotten eggs!
I’ve simply decided that I want to go home, I don’t really like it here anymore. I’m on an adventure of faith… the faith that my heavenly home is being prepared for me, as I speak! There shall be NO security upon this broken and fallen world… not for me! I’m going home! This world is just a process I have to get through to reach my destiny… Home!
I am a woman of God, a child of the Creator of the universe, and right now, I’m struggling with each and every passage in scripture… but I’m reading it anyway! Why? Because it’s not always about doing things only when you feel like it, that’s why.
The bible tells us that we will have troubles in this world because of Him, but we should still be encouraged because He did all the heavy lifting, long ago. He has made a way home for us, but we need to follow that path if we really wish to get there.
In my mind, that’s a fairly big adventure! I’m on my way home one day at a time, for only God knows my arrival time. I get to choose how I get there, though. I suppose that I could just give up and wait for my own departure, like a petulant little girl. Or, I can do it with grace, keeping a smile on my face, praise on my lips, and hope in my heart.
I’m going with the hope of heaven, rather than the cry baby part. I really do get sick of hearing myself complain, so instead, I write strange and wonderful adventurous stories of myself and my imaginary friends. We fill our days with adventures that I shall never do, travel to exotic lands that I’ll never visit, and be the hero that I’ll never really be. These are my adventure in search of security! Anyone is welcome aboard this vessel, if you so choose to join us. Adventures are always more fun with friends, wouldn’t you agree?
There’s unlimited cookies for my crew!
Having water in the desert…
Saying that spirituality is important in one’s life seems uncomfortably broad to me, personally. Nowadays, referring to spirituality can go in many different directions. I’ll answer the question from the perspective of a child of God.
In honesty, I live a spirit-filled life every single day! It’s a very deep and intimate relationship with my maker, God himself! He is my comfort when I am sorrowful, my strength when I am weak, and eternally faithful to sustain me, in all things.
It’s kind of like traveling through a desolate and parched land. Know where your water sources are, if you wish to survive the sands! I’m fairly certain that water flows throughout the desert, deep underground. It’s there, but the traveler must know where to find it. After you’ve traveled to to those sources enough times, their location becomes embedded in your muscle memory… you just remember.
As far as my actual spirit-filled life, the bible is one of my water sources. That muscle memory I just mentioned? In this instance, I’m referring to my brain’s ability to recall a thing I’ve read and/or learned… you know, use it or lose it! Then there’s my prayer life, which is my source of sustenance, peace, grace, forgiveness, and so much love… I’m in the presence of my creator!
As for that spirituality part of the prompt, I am filled with the Holy Spirit, which is part of God’s spirit, sent to dwell within this vessel. It says so in the bible,
“And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:13, 14
Anyways, that should answer the prompt in an honest and honorable manner without dragging things out for hours. I could, you know!
Because I love you, I’ll settle for handing out cookies instead…
Body Heal Thy Self mode…
It’s a quiet Sunday morning, here.
Currently, I’m laying low and allowing my system some serious down time, if that makes any sense. I realize that I said body heal thy self, but it’s a bit more than that. While my mode wishes it to be so, I’ve placed myself in the hands of a rather competent physician, opting for a compromise in the “do it myself” department.
Careful selection of medications paired with a radical change in diet should hopefully allow my body to do some internal repair and restoration. I’d like to say that I was an iron clad warrior through our little sojourn in the wilderness, but it wasn’t exactly like that. Sadly, no muscle bound wild woman roared out of the darkness, but rather, a very exhausted, sick, and humble grandmother of six literally limped into this apartment. Can you believe it’s been two months already? Well, something like that… I’ve honestly lost track of time.
One of the medications I’m currently on is used for repairing the lining of my stomach. It must be taken four times a day for at least a month, possibly longer. The struggle has been to take the prescribed four doses without eating for several hours on either side of each dose. Add to that, my diet now restricts lactose, gluten, and…………… caffeine! Nooooooooooooooooooooo!
Yes!
It’s actually not so bad, now that I’m used to decaf with non-dairy creamer mixed with oat milk. So far, so good, right?!
This last rough patch simply took more out of me than I wanted to admit. My mom had several strokes, a heart attack, due to both a history of high cholesterol and high blood pressure. She was also a diabetic. The woman oozed bad health for the entirety of her life, eventually passing from Dementia. This last set of bloodwork really made me pay attention to this history. I did a bunch of reading on the relationship between cholesterol and blood pressure, and I don’t want to follow my mother’s health journey. I’ve got a new grandbaby due in November, you guys. I need to be on deck!
So, until things start going in the right direction, health wise, I focus on nothing more than sleep, medication, reading, working on my final read through of a manuscript, and eating like a bird. Honestly, I don’t even mind eating sparsely right now, what with all that medication in my stomach. Not much of anything sounds good, aside from oatmeal and bananas.
The good side of this seclusion is that my imagination is on fire!
I’ve been thoroughly enjoying myself with adventures on the high seas, along with wrapping up this first novel. It’s time to begin the second volume. What better way to prep for it than to read the first story again, so it’s fresh in my mind.
Just because I’m turning lemons into lemonade Wiwohka style, it doesn’t mean that I’d recommend such a radical shift in lifestyle to anyone. This has been my modes operandum for a lifetime… feast or famine… highs and lows… joy and grief! Nothing in life worth having comes without cost, nor can we always have what we want without the cost taking it’s toll. I wanted to smoke cigarettes’ as a kid and it took me 40 years to quit! I wanted children and lost five babies in the attempt to bear the three beautiful girls I’ve got! I wanted my freedom from my first husband and it cost me the relationships I had with all three of my children! So many lessons in life have taught me how entwined the good is with the bad. No matter how hard we try, we cannot seem to have one without the other.
Maybe that’s the whole balance thing…
He calls me His own…
What follows is something I shared back in 2017, and wasn’t originally a response to this prompt, at least I don’t think it was. At first, I was going to title this response “Beautifully Broken” and share a poem that I’d written last February but I quickly changed my mind when I saw this old entry. While it was a distance down memory lane, I believe that it still carries some deep truths.
I know that we all, at some point, ask ourselves the question, “Who am I?” The easy answer would be to look at the past and add up all that we have done to date. I am sure that if I were wealthy with a following of friends that adored me, I might feel quite accomplished. I suppose it would be easier to justify mistakes and costly losses, reassuring myself that it has made me who I am so it was worth it. How much money would it take for me to be OK with that last comment? How many friends would it take for me to not feel regret over any hurts that I have caused due to my selfish mistakes in life? I am not saying that I want to walk through my life in misery over my past failures, but they are there all the same, always floating in the shadows, seeking to pull me down into the depths of despair. Being a human with faults and imperfections embedded in my nature is quite daunting, and yet God sees me as a precious treasure…go figure. Rather than dropping a rock on my head, He lifts me up, and always seeks to reassure and encourage me with His grace and mercy. It seems that my brokenness and failures are where God teaches me the most about who I am. He does not seek me and love me because I am so good, but rather, because I recognize that I cannot do anything without Him. I am not expressing my feelings to teach some big lesson, nor am I judging anyone else who may have an easier life than mine; I am simply sharing my heart in regards to my relationship with Christ. I am on a journey of self discovery and what I have found is that Who I am is Christ in me. I have accepted that I cannot do anything without Him. I have spent nearly 50 years trying to do it on my own strength and have left a path of mistakes and regrets that I will carry to my grave. But the difference now is that I do not carry them alone, but with the strength, forgiveness and love of my Heavenly Father, who walks before me, behind me, beside me and often carrying me. Who am I? I am Redeemed, Reborn, Renewed, Forgiven, Cherished, and a Child of the Risen King!
While my favorite thing about myself is belonging to one much greater than I… my cookie baking skills are rather impressive (virtually speaking, of course), wouldn’t you say?
You do seem to come back for more, so at least they aren’t terrible. I’ll admit they might sometimes come with hair, feathers, or a bit of fuzz off the floor, but still.
Truth be told, I think that’s where the magic comes from…
Lost for a cause, not a lost cause…
Yes, we are still sailing through uncharted waters, but I suppose that one might say we’re not really ready to seek dry land, just yet!
You see, we have a new passenger aboard our vessel, a very hairy, rather confused, and terribly frightened one! While I realize that we should be in hot pursuit of a lonely little troll named Peanut, sometimes things happen that force us to shift plans, temporarily, of course.
Not to worry, though. Just now, it’s only early in summer and we’ve plenty of safe sailing weather left to us until the fall season begins. As soon as we are once more within sight of land, I’ve a good idea where to locate the little guy.
For now, we’ve a case of need that sits before us, right here on the deck of our ship!
First things first… calm the terrified creature, before he tries to jump ship on us!
While I am very well acquainted with dogs, which the creature sort of resembles, I’ve no idea what to think of the wings, nor the seashells that seem to be embedded within his chest. Canine fur… check! Seashells and wings… wait, what? Do I pet him or not? I’ve been trying to talk gently to him, but I don’t think he understands anything I’m saying, at all!
All we thought to do was quietly sit near him, hoping our presence would ease his fear. He’s not frightened of us, mind you, but something about a ship fills the creature with terror, possibly from bad memories of his beginnings. I’m not entirely certain. I’ve been quietly observing him, while the babes are busy trying to feed him cookies. They’ve decided that he’s merely a fluffy dog with wingy thingies, as they put it. I’m not so sure…
Yes, he does really resemble a dog if you focus on his face and body build, but I’ve never actually seen a dog with fur that’s the color of the sea, have you? The entirety of his chest and underbelly seems to be more hardened seashells, than fur. His wings and tail sort of remind me of a great bird, like something off of a Jurassic Park film. While he may have been on some sort of vessel, at one time or another, it’s almost as if he came right out of the sea, itself!
Whatever one might imagine of his origins, it doesn’t really matter at this very moment, does it? It’s not going to help us calm our newest family member, nor aid him in finding his sea legs, which is necessary if we’re to travel anywhere.
Not only do I need him to be calm and settled, but if we’re to keep him safely hidden until we get back to the barnyard, we really need to understand each other on some level. The first thing we need to do is give him a name, so that he can learn to recognize when we call to him… something better than “hey you” or “here doggy”, which seems rather misguided, as I don’t think he’s really a dog, at all!
Beings as he’s such a gentle creature, it seems that he should be given a name that reflects this nature. While I may be rather good at telling tales, one’s name should be taken far more seriously… so I googled it… don’t judge!
After some heartfelt searching, a name appeared on my computer screen that caught my eye…
Osric the Gentle
Meaning of the first name Osric
Origin English
Meaning God ruler
Variations Orrick, Doric, Godric
*Some content has been generated by an artificial intelligence language model, in combination with data sourced from Ancestry records and provided by BabyNames.com.
The name Osric finds its roots in the English language and carries the weighty meaning of God ruler. Its origin can be traced back to early medieval England, where it gained popularity as a given name. In those times, individuals often held a deep reverence for their spiritual beliefs, and the combination of God and ruler in one name sought to embody the power and authority attributed to individuals who were appointed by divine will. Throughout history, the name Osric has remained relatively uncommon, primarily appearing in English literature and royal pedigrees. In literary works such as William Shakespeare’s Hamlet, a character named Osric is introduced as a courtier, known for his grandiloquent speech and flamboyant personality. This portrayal reflects the name’s association with nobility, as befitting a courtier in medieval times. Despite its rich historical background, the name Osric is now rarely used in modern-day society. The changing cultural landscape and the preference for more contemporary names have contributed to its decline. While its regal connotations and divine allusions may still hold appeal for some, Osric has gradually become an obscure choice for parents seeking to name their children.
Somehow, it just seemed to fit… and honestly, I still don’t really understand why. Fortunately for us, we have plenty of summer left out in these waters to figure it out!
We’ve begun to simply call him Osrig for short, sort of like a combination of Osric and Gentle, if that makes any sense. Even if it doesn’t make sense, it still seems to make his eyes twinkle every time we call him by that name.
I’m truly hoping that somebody spots this message in a bottle… or else, this letter was for naught…
Oh well, you’ll find it eventually.
Me Ticker…
Technically, I suppose that you might say my heart belongs to God, my husband, and my baby girls… but, it’s still tucked within this vessel and it hasn’t stopped ticking!
It’s been injured, torn, and at times, completely broken into what felt like a thousand unrepairable pieces… but it still keeps ticking!
It was the very hand of God that started it ticking, some 56 years ago, and it could stop at any given moment, if it be my time… but for now, it keeps ticking!
One’s heart is a miraculous thing, actually! Though it be only an organ that pumps blood through the body, providing oxygen, it is so much more than that! A heart actually feels pain whether it be physical, emotional, or spiritual! None of the other organs in the body give off a physical sensation of emotional pain, nor spiritual suffering like the heart does, in my opinion. I’m unaware that my kidney or spleen ever throb with deep sorrow when I’m nursing grief or hurt feelings, but maybe it’s different for others… whose to say.
I did really think on this mornings prompt, as it was rather specific about choosing only one item. And, it had to be both the oldest thing we owned and also used every day.
I may have used my own heart, abused my own heart, broken it, lied to it, stolen from it, taken it’s love and given it away for all the wrong reasons…
But it’s still tickin!
Cookie?
That Sweet Spot…
There is nothing more powerful than when you are on your knees in prayer, surrounded by God’s mighty warriors, and you feel His mighty presence!
My favorite moments are the ones where I find myself at my lowest, my weakest, and I hear His voice in the stillness…
“Child, oh my sweet child, bring it to Me… I will heal your hurt, bind your wounds, and fill you with My Spirit… just bring it to Me.”
Yup! Those have to be my favorite moments!
Cookie…
Journey With Me! 