It’s been over 30 years since I raised my babies, and at least 5 since I watched over a baby full-time.

While I’d like to say that I’ve got this, no problem, there is still some butterflies in my stomach.

I’m no spring chicken, as they say. Will this body hold up?

My relationship with my daughter is a fragile one, do to my own shortcomings as a mother. It’s almost as if my grandbaby is bridging a gap between the two of us, providing an area of safe ground for rebuilding bonds, once more.

I’ve always wanted and prayed for the opportunity to be there for my daughters, and be the MeeMaw that my grandchildren will adore. Now is one of my chances!

Oh lord, I pray that you give me that which I need, for the sake of those I love.

I don’t even know why I’m writing all this stuff down, really. I guess it helps to put it down on paper, or a computer screen, in this case.

No need for answers, or words of self-affirmation.

It simply helps to write out my thoughts. Then I can observe where they take me, or how they keep me grounded, if that makes any sense.

Obviously, I can remember how to care for a baby. That’s not the issue, I don’t think. Most probably, it’s the fact that she’s not mine, first of all. Caring for something so precious that belongs to another is a wonderful, yet, terrifying venture. I don’t think I ever really doubted myself as a mother. It just felt natural, some how.

With my granddaughter, I feel inadequate, somehow. I’m not mamma! I can’t make all the monsters go away, and make the world feel safe like she can. I smell different than mom, sound different, and behave in a different manner. This will all be a huge adjustment for her, and my desire is to make it as gentle as possible.

Life can take one in so many differing directions, offering a multitude of opportunities and experiences. But something about a baby on scene, and the rest of the world seems to fade to grey… for me, at least.

Babies are such a vivid example of Gods design for humans. They begin life so small, and fragile. Each day, we find their eyes full of wonder at the world around them, as they grow and develop. It’s such an awesome thing to observe a baby learning their first words, taking their first steps, and becoming more independent, and self-reliant.

I feel so honored to get the opportunity to be a part of Maisie’s world. And, you’ll get to read about all of it. Most likely, my Thursdays will be thoughts of all that we’ve been up to, and how we’re both getting along. Maybe that’s boring for you, but honestly, it’s not really about you, nor is it about me any longer.

I’m kind of sick of talking about myself all the time. I think she’s much more interesting, by far.

With all that being said, I am confident that this will be one adventure worth documenting.

Let the fun begin, right?! Well, not til Monday, that is. Until then, I’m gonna play hard like I did when I was a kid. Remember when you knew that school was starting up soon? You played even harder, stayed up later, and slept til it was lunchtime, knowing that those easy days of summer were fast disappearing. I’m gonna play like that, only I do my playing on the computer. Don’t judge! Like I said earlier, I’m no spring chicken anymore.

My adventures are all virtual. Why? Because my body hurts less, afterwards. You do the math…