When that little boy looks out onto the pond, rock in hand, preparing to cast it… does he expect to see the ripples before or after he throws?
As for us grown-ups, when we cast our little wordy missiles at others, do we expect the ripple of reaction before or after we aim and fire?
Just askin?
So ya, faint hearts never won fair ladies as they say, because getting old is NO picnic! I feel like some explorer preparing to embark on a huge and daunting expedition.
I will say without a doubt, the care I am receiving with this new Eye Specialist is absolutely Stellar. It is an odd sensation to enter a professional medical establishment, and later walk out feeling good… in my personal experience.
I have had doctors tell me I was fine, I have had doctors lie to me, and I have had a doctor actually ask me to leave, and later sent me divorce papers from his office. He asked me if I thought he believed me, and when I said no he just closed his laptop, got up saying he was unable to help me, and walked out of the exam room.
While I realize that I may be a difficult medical case, that is NOT my fault! When did I drive down to the local Healthcare Department store, walk up to the Illness counter and order a Supersize on some Child Abuse… add an order of Mental and Emotional Trauma in the form of IBS, and also for my drink and dessert… please throw in Fibromyalgia, Arthritis and a Degenerative Disc thingy. Oh yeah, and can you throw in a side order of PTSD and Cataracts.
My point is, I did not ask to have things go wrong in my life, but I didn’t realize how many doctors would mishandle things, that’s all.
For whatever His reasons are, the Lord is prompting me to step out in faith and seek some care. If I am going to write to you everyday, waxing poetic about God leading and guiding us, I should probably practice what I preach if I am being completely honest.
Surprisingly, all my appointments with both the Eye Surgeon and my new Medical Doctor have gone quite smoothly. The X-rays came back and finally the Arthritis is clearly visible in both my pictures and in my bloodwork. Now I just wait for my upcoming appointment with the Sports Medicine Specialist. I have had this pain all my life, but was always poopoo’d by the professionals… “No No, everything’s fine, nothings wrong… it’s just your imagination.” Maybe things will play out better this time around… either way, I’ll go forward in faith.
The forward faith walking I will be embarking on, for my eyes at least, will commence on November 29th. Apparently, this particular day will be the start to a 3 week adventure package including but not limited to, 2 separate eye surgeries and 2 follow up appointments for each eye. But wait, there’s more… not just the 6 appointments are included, but an eye drop medication regime 4 times a day, just to add some excitement. Though it seems daunting to juggle all this in a short time period, I would rather do it all together than stagger the surgeries and have to wear a pair of glasses with one of the lenses popped out, for the weeks of waiting in between procedures.
I am considering the purchase of a pair of those cosmetic contact lenses… you know, the ones with like zombie eyes or vampire eyes. Maybe to break my tension of things, I could hand the doctor a pair of these contacts as they wheel me in for surgery, suggesting he place the ones I picked out ahead of time. As I will be pretty medicated by this time, perhaps I should rethink this, as I won’t be sober enough to stop the doctor if he takes me serious.
What sort of things would I do if I could,
can be answered in only one way…
A Song!
We can thank Celine Dion for answering this question so well … https://youtu.be/rPofyjLmGQU?si=c6T9jJA65pxPZ3Jk
Since I am so incredibly busy with all the stuff that I hadn’t done before, I am just full up on ideas of something new, as of yet.
I am learning how to have a healthy relationship with my adult daughter for the first time…
I am writing a full novel for the first time…
I am coping without a dog for the first time…
We are living in an RV for the first time…
I spend my day in a beautiful Lobby for the first time…
I am surviving without any prescriptive medications for the first time…
I walk long walks nearly every day for the first time…
I am learning to live as a Woman of Faith for the first time…
So see, I am full up in the try new things department. I spent 45 minutes trying to write out some ideas but it seemed more like a Dr. Seuss story…
I could eat Sushi I could
I would be sick I would…
I should be a singer I should
I could sing ditties I could…
I would break hearts I would
I should sell millions of copies I should…
I could race a car I could
Since I can’t see… I would wreck I would…
STOP ME!!!
I’ve gone round the bend on this silly question, so I leave you with this… If you can do something or try something, do it with all your might, for tomorrow has no guarantees nor time to look back on WOULDA COULDA SHOULDA!
Here is a treat I’ve never tried before…
I think it is some sort of custard, inside a delicately thin pastry.
Well, I am off to a pre op appointment with the Eye Surgeon this afternoon… not that you needed to know this, but I’m going to tell you anyway. You are my friends and friends are supposed to care about what goes on in each others lives, so I tell you about things assuming that it is important to you. If it isn’t, well then, just play along for my sake.
Tuesday is ending up to be just Tuesdays Thoughts and Things, as I have had things fly sideways on that day of the week for nearly a month now. Just assume that it will simply be a writers grab bag day of the week, or maybe like a box of Chocolates… Forest Gump said it best, “You never know what your gonna get”.
I turned Wednesdays into a Laugh off Joke day, but no one is playing. Suck it up Buttercup, and get a joke in the comments! I am sick of laughing at only My Jokes… I mean, come on, I know I am funny but not THAT funny!
Live Novel Friday continues the story of Brutus so don’t fall behind.
This weekend continues the Note to Self series and also Live Wire so don’t miss out, and don’t forget the potluck afterwards on Sunday. After last weeks caramel kerfuffle, I have opted for a less mess kind of foodie affair this week… I still have a chunk of caramel corn in my tooth. Since it is pouring cats and dogs this week, I am going with a Comfort Food theme… please, for the love of all that is holy, will you give me some soup flavors for my homemade bread bowls.
For those who are interested, the next audio recording of My Truths is in the Lobby.
Have a Blessed Week everybody!!!
How many times do people say one thing and do another? We see it all the way from Government behavior down to the greasy fingered toddler promising they did NOT eat your French fry.
Obviously, my faith should reflect a clear picture of the principles I live by, but just in case you’re still not sure, it’s JESUS example!
From my earliest memories of life, I saw everyone around me behaving contrary to everything that came out of their mouths… from honesty to lies, kindness to cruelty, generosity with a tag, and the famous “Do as I say and Not as I do” Act of 1682! Some grown up idiot came up with this slogan shortly after they got caught doing something bad in front of a kid.
Of all the principles I can choose from to define how I live, it would be the life of Christ that has forever impacted my world. I just know that when I do and say as Jesus would, things turn out far differently in my life than if I reacted like the world does. Nothing has really changed since I was small in regards to human behavior. I am not even immune to this natural state of selfishness. We are born to sneak, cheat, lie, steal, and all the rest of our undesirable natural traits.
We are also blessed with a unique spirit, one that is unlike everybody else. This spirit has the ability to give love, kindness, generosity, grace, mercy and all the rest of our beautiful human capabilities.
I suppose that principles are what separate the wheat from the chaff, as the good book says. Humans are such creatures of habit that all one need do is watch em for a while, and their underlying “Principles” start to surface… if you get my meaning.
As this seems to be how things roll out in the big picture department, I want to ensure that what others see of me… isn’t me at all, but the One in whose principles I define my life by!
Since I like to shake things up and usually choose the road less traveled, I say we all should start living by and saying,
“Do As He Says and Not As I Do”!
Just sayin,
Here, have some fries…
Promises!
As the story of Jacob and his sons comes to an end, I am left with so many avenues of thought to wander down, and insights to ponder. I won’t even begin to attempt summarizing all of what went down within this family, nor will I attempt to answer any of the many whys that surfaced as I read of this families train wreck of life events. If I am unable to fully explain my own ridiculous series of life missteps, I most certainly won’t be successful in summing up things for Jacob either.
That being said, I will share some takeaways that formed within my mind as I watched things unfold for the whole of Abrahams family tree. Yes you did see me bring another player into this story, because remember that Gods promise to Israel began back before Joseph or Jacob even began.
How differently things would have turned out, had Abraham refused to walk Isaac all the way up that mountain… had he not been fully prepared to sacrifice his child, to the point of God having to stay his hand. I would like to say that I could walk that walk… til you asked me to pick up a blade.
How might it have played out, had Isaacs eyesight been better and the theft of a birthright never happened? I am so grateful that we serve a God who sees and knows everything we do not!
Leave it to say that I am simply grateful for a plan that God put in place way back in the beginning, as the doors to Eden were closed and locked behind Adam and Eve… forever!
God knew exactly what He was doing when He made that covenant with Abraham. God knew about the theft even before Jacob stole it… He was fully aware of the fall out. God saw all the ripples in all the ponds involved… before He ever made the promise to Abraham. That is a sobering thought. I also think it is comforting if you think about it. It continues to prove my point, in that God loves broken things… broken hearts, broken lives and broken spirits!
If we were all perfect and put together, we would never know we needed Him! We are human and therefore, creatures of habit… sinful habit. We would take for granted what has been done for us, and to whom we all belong.
God knows this about us, this habit of self over others… we were born with it, so there is no sense trying to figure out who to blame for our human nature, save one, in my opinion. Unfortunately, all too often we blame God when bad things happen to good people and visa versa. The only constant I can see is how God is always there to help us pick up the pieces and carry on.
Thankfully, even when we humans are selfish and unfaithful, He is not… as I see clearly in the story I have been following here in Genesis. If I know God the way I think I do, even if Abraham chose to disobey… God would still have made a way for him, for his children, for Israel, for you, for me and all of humanity.
I could go on for days about things still whirling around in my brain over this family and their part in our history, but I think it best you check it out for yourself, if you are still interested. As for me, I am off to the book of Exodus to see what lies within its pages.
I leave you with a song I thought would relate to our conversation. Take a listen and then be sure to stick around for a bite to eat before you leave.
Promises by Maverick City Music https://youtu.be/HC87F9WQWHU?si=-tkLxlJRfQT3ZO40
Today’s Live Wire Potluck Theme is everything Caramel…
We start things off with some Caramel coated pancakes with bananas on top…
Or if you prefer, some Caramel Apple Crepes…
Help yourself to some Caramel Corn…
Followed by some Caramel Glazed Ham…
For Dessert I offer you some Caramel Crème Brule…
If your teeth hurt, it’s your own fault! I said what the Theme was going to be today, clear back on Monday and no one stopped me… so here we all are with aching teeth and a lot of regrets! For the love of Pete, would someone stop me the next time I decide to do something we all will regret!
God Bless and have a beautiful Sunday!
Hugs!!!
Though the picture may seem cute, I on the other hand, do not look nearly as adorable after attempting to color my own hair, of late.
My hair is way overdue for some gray coverage upkeep, but here is the rub… I can barely see myself clearly in the mirror, and my right arm concerns have yet to be resolved, so I have limited use of that side. Between those two problems, the woman that I become after a self color job is far less “Adorbs” as the little sugar plum in the picture!
It is hilarious, to say the least! My hair resembles a cross between the patchy white stripes on the roadway, and a calico cat with its mottled fur. I kept missing so many places and having to reapply the color… still not able to see all the patches I was missing. I finally gave up and have been wearing a hat.
I know it’s not a matter of need to have no visible gray, but come on, we all know how self esteem can be a game changer in ones attitude. My insides tell me I can still be that young and beautifully wild woman I was when I was 20, but my outsides are not cooperating. As someone once said, “time waits for no man”… or woman for that matter.
It may seem funny to think this way, but I’m sort of just wearing my hat and waiting for my eye surgeries, since I’m not able to really see how bad it is anyway. I know I could have a professional do the work for me, but I am both cheap and homebound, having lost my license until I can see the road again.
Please don’t think I am being flippant, in regards to today’s prompt. I simply don’t have anything else that I am putting off doing… except, that is, publishing a book. I believe that might change, as I’m not putting it off, I’m just not done yet…
The woman behind the counter smiled gently at me, as she cleaned her ear piercing tools. My heart was in my throat, it seemed. Getting my ears pierced was the most grown up thing I had ever done by my own choice.
My Nana had bought me a pair of earrings in the shape of bright red apples, but this time the jewelry wasn’t clip on… they were the real thing in the eyes of a 6 year old. My mother told me that I could get my ears done if I chose on my own… no hand holding or cajoling would be forthcoming.
I lay in bed awake the entire night before we embarked on this grown up lady stuff I wanted to take part in. I was terrified, of what I am not sure… but if they could poke me with a vaccination needle whenever they felt like it, and trade me a stupid sucker for my time, then I must be grown up enough to take the needle for a pair of gloriously beautiful red apple earrings. My mind was made up on the matter, so I just lay there and waited for the sun to come up.
I was so terrified of backing down and not being able to wear my new gift… it was in truth, the only thing that kept me on that swinging stool, there in that Bon Marche Department Store. I tucked my feet behind the bar beneath the seat, grabbed the sides of the stool with both hands in a military vice grip and tried to find my happy place.
I apparently had nothing to worry about, because it was over before it had begun! That fast… bang bang… All Done! They were kind enough to do both ears at the same moment, probably in case I backed out half way through the deal. I was so happy and proud of myself that I burst into tears, making the grown ups think I was in pain or shock. Not so!
I WAS A LADY!
So now I will explain the hilarious fall out from my Grown Up Anxiety Filled Sleepless Night… the reality of how most adults handle stress.
As exhausted as I was from no sleep and worry, over my piercing adventure, I never had a moment to catch some zzzzzz’s until that night after we got home. I was so tired that I could barely touch my dinner, and vaguely remember my mom walking me down the hallway to my bedroom……..
…. The rain fell steadily in the darkness, only illuminated by the distant street lamps, flickering occasionally. I was sitting in the passenger seat of our station wagon, while my parents were in a Parent/Teacher Conference up the street. As I waited for them to return, I saw movement not too far down the block, barely visible through the sheets of rain falling across the hood of the car.
I heard her before I saw her… this scary Witch that looked suspiciously like the lady off of the Wizard of Oz, if I am being completely honest. I could hear her laughing wickedly as she slowly materialized out of the darkness. Yup! It had to be that horrible woman who took Toto away from Dorothy. Don’t judge… I have a bucket list of different childhood memories that are triggered by different movies I had in my tiny mind.
Anyway, as the witch steadily approached my car, I frantically checked all the door locks and glanced up at the entrance of the School, hoping I would see my parents walking down the steps toward our car. Nope! As Jack Sparrow says, I was “all by me onesies”!
I crawled down under the dash where I could be hidden from view for the most part, except my feet could still be seen from the passenger door. I heard her approach the car, walk all the way around it dragging her super long witchy fingernails across the metal doors… witches always have super long curvy red nails if you needed a visual.
Then the witch stopped directly in front of the passenger side door where I was crouched down on the floor. All I could see was the tip of her hat, but I could hear what she was doing… she was picking the lock on my door with those awful fingernails. I watched in horror as the little metal door lock popped!
The next thing I knew, I was strapped onto a torture table, in the parking lot underneath the Sprouse Ritz Department Store, and that witch began to tickle me with those long fingernails…
It was torture! I began to laugh and could not stop! I fought to get away, but was strapped down so there was no escape for me… no way out! Except to wake up, but I had been so tired from the night before that it was like crawling through thick Jello to do anything. Never fear though, laughter is here… I laughed so hard that I rolled myself out of the top of our bunkbed and landed with a thump on the floor below. That did the trick!
Isn’t it funny the way we handle stress… often bottling our fears, stuffing them down and hiding them away from judging eyes. I realize that I was just a child and that the dream was probably just a way to release the tension I had been holding for several days over a perceived painful event. There was no real danger or trauma involved in ear piercing, but to a child trying to be a grown up, it most assuredly seemed like there might.
My take away from the whole affair was this… I would for sure think long and hard the next time I wanted to be a grown up!
From then to now, I still often find myself thinking long and hard every time I have to do grown up stuff… I know I should be fine with getting tickled all night in a parking lot, but this girl would rather leave the Witch back at Sprouse Reitz…
I don’t normally plan beyond the day, sometimes even beyond the moment! God and I have come to a place where I simply trust that He knows what needs doing… and when to do it!
It says in the bible that God supplies us with all we need for whatever is asked, so I guess I will just wait for the money to arrive and I am sure He will tell me exactly what to do with it. I would probably just go shopping if I tried to figure out on my own what to do with the money, I am just being honest.
I feel pretty confident that if the money lands on me, then God will fill in the details, and I am ok with that! There is so much need in the world, it would be easy to pick any number of avenues to donate. I could spend my time dreaming of winning money to help others, or I could just help!
With all of the lottery winners out there that are showing us how to give to the poor with their winnings, my confidence lags in regards to how many folks would actually follow through with their answer to this prompt. I am not judging anyone… remember I already stated that I would probably go shopping. I am just wise enough about human nature to know better than to spout poetic about my giving tree ideas.
Besides, we live in an RV… where on earth would I put whatever I bought? If we bought a new RV or a house, then what? Fill it with stuff I can’t take with me when I die? I have always had a love/hate relationship with money… I love it when I have it, and I hate it when I don’t!
Ima just wait here til the check is in the mail, and then let God work out the details. Until then…
Have some Million Dollar Shortbread to hold us over til the money shows…
Laying it down…
I gotta stop rubber necking… always circling the same painful mountains of things I can’t undo. It’s a daily battle, even for this woman of Faith. This old way of thinking is so destructive to the getting up off your face and walking on part of life, that so many face.
In the spirit of keeping it real, I felt it important to include a note reminding me to cut myself some slack, and rest on a truth we should all adopt for a healthier self. Let go of past mistakes I can’t change… it’s an unproductive waste of time! What should be more important to me, is what I do with the time I still have left to make a difference in this world.
Note to Self #9
Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3: 13, 14
The song “Lay it Down” by Tasha Layton grabbed my heart as I was writing this article. The words reminded me let go of burdens He is already carrying for me, and the sins He has already forgiven! I hope you take a moment out of your day to have a listen.
Journey With Me! 