Thing number one, in answer to this ridiculous prompt, it seems rather obvious that if I’m always reading and writing on this platform… Your sites would appear to be my favorites!
And…
Thing number two, this is a dumb question, so I’m hijacking the prompt and putting whatever I want in its place!
Why… because it’s my toy box, and I can do what I want in here, that’s why!
Now that you’ve waded through my toys, there’s some cookies and milk below that should end things on a happy note…
Why is this so earth shatteringly important that I think it imperative to share with everyone?
Well, let me explain…
Just the other day I told someone something I’d heard in the past, regarding how hippo’s fart through their mouths. After thinking on it, I realized that I’d heard it from a movie with Val Kilmer, where he made that statement. I have actually never fact checked the information… and one should always do this before the retelling of a thing!
Here is what I found, everyone, and I was shocked, dismayed… and ran for my toothbrush:
According to Googleydoo,
Normal, harmless bacteria in the intestine break down food and produce gas. Any excess gas production or accumulation will cause the passing of gas to occur through the mouth or rectum. Therefore, your friend was partially correct, hippos do pass gas through their mouths. It is called “burping.”
If you haven’t seen it yet, I wish to bring your attention to the fact that, in reality… everyone does this with the gases that the body produces! Yeah, that is pretty horrifying when you think about all the times you felt safe burping around your guests, family and/or friends.
So, as I try to brush my teeth without throwing up, I want to warn everyone for the future of this world… watch where you’re pointing that thing, and cover your mouth…
Here, if your stomach can handle it, have a cookie…
Look!!! Corporate has issued Eustace his very own office!
He took a coarse on Hump Day Therapy, and got a degree and everything! We’ve hung it on his office wall, so you’ll have to go in there if you wish to check his credentials.
If you haven’t read it yet, corporate released the camels big news in this weeks newsletter… it shows him with his instructor, as he received his diploma!
Ok, just to make sure nobody misses out on it, I’ve clipped the picture from the article and added it below:
I never thought he would graduate so fast, in fact, it seems like only yesterday that he grew his first hump….. (sniffles, and then blows into a tissue).
Camel snacks in the break room, everyone!
Congratulations, Eustace… We’re so proud!!!!
While many might consider this an easy question to answer, already having a list of wishes sitting in their reserve brain bank, just waiting for the day they encounter a magic Genie… CAUTION!!!!
Before you throw out your three magic wishes, in hopes of satisfying the Daily Prompt, I must bid you a warning… check their references!!!
First of all, how many times have we wanted and wished for a thing, only to regret it? I, personally, have some doozies!
Secondly, many Genies come with tricks and undisclosed disclaimers… if they assure you of the rules, do your due diligence to investigate their work history, first!
I suggest that you seek out some testimonials of your particular Genie, just to check on the satisfaction level… or survivability record, of previous users.
I always try to remember, just in case I were to run into a magic genie somewhere, no wish is as simple as it seems, and many come with extras that you hadn’t considered… or were prepared to handle…
Just sayin!
I promise these cookies aren’t magic ones… though they are pretty special…
Trick or Treating is very near
The time has almost come
That game of candy retrieval…
There’s still so much to be done!
Some Dentists smile
While others are cringing
Wallets are straining…
as bellies are binging!
Parents prepare for a night to remember
yet, others plan on turning it into a bender
Children in costumes, whether bought or hand-made…
Candy hunting parties to form, retrieval plans to be laid!
Words of warning
to all those first timers
Too much sugar left out…
Results in tummy aches and whiners!
It was an iffy ending, but at least I didn’t fully lose my train of thought on this one.
I’m no quitter!
They’re joking, right?!
Why would I pay someone money, if I had any to throw around, to get flung into outer space, with the risk of running out of oxygen… or better yet, simply implode?!
The mere thought of either scenario, makes me feel a bit ill. However, for the sake of adventure and all that, I’d consider the mission if someone wants to pay me to do it.
I’ll fly to the moon for no less than a thou… a hundred tho… ONE BILLION Dollars… yup, that feels about right!
Here, have a space cookie…
The leaves are all falling
and Winter is a calling
Sweaters we’re now wearing
and there’s cocoa for sharing…
Also, sleepy and weepy
due to the air pressure shift
Requiring more power naps
and triple latte’s for a lift…
So as the winds change,
And the trees all fall asleep
Take care of yourselves
and don’t chew gum off the street!
Ok, don’t blame me for that last line… my coffee got cold, and I didn’t realize it until after taking a drink. I only paused from writing this for a second, I swear it!
Sometimes, I feel more like a dog than a person… Squirrel!!!
Oh well, that’s how poetry is for me, at times. I catch a thread of something and start writing it down, only to find that I’ve lost my train of thought somewhere in the middle. Yeesh! How do you guys and gals all do it? Day after day, you bring it with such creativeness and fervor… well, my hat’s off to you! I think that I shall leave the poetry to the poets and stick to what I do best, which is really just writing whatever the storms bring on the winds…
Let me think about this for a moment…
Huh! I’m sure I can think of something, like I know my kids survived my cooking, and all that. But is there something specific I’ve cooked in the past that someone else might find dream inspiring, or anything?
Oh! I know… wait……… nope! It was on the tip of my tongue, and I almost had it, but then it was gone…
Wow! This prompt question is harder than I thought it was going to be, when I first started to consider an answer. Now, for goodness sake, there has to be something that has made tails wag and and tongues drool, right? Whenever I get invited to any social gatherings with food involved, hasn’t there been some item always being requested, “if it wouldn’t be a bother?”
For Pete’s sake, this is hard!
The only thing I can do, which is really nothing of a big deal, or anything… I did bake these little things once, sweet things, if I remember correctly. Once they cooled from the oven, my kids said that they were kind of chewy and kind of crunchy, all at the same time. Then they said that they could taste the flavor of nuts mixed with a sweet melty thing, but quite honestly I can’t remember what they call those things, these days.
Well, if any of you can think of something, could you please let me know? It would really help me out!
As a way of saying thank you, I made some silly cookies. I mean, their not the greatest, but it’s early and if you haven’t eaten yet, they should be alright…
Eustace wants to give out free rides to anyone needing a lift…
He’s outside if anyone needs a Hump Day “Pick Me Up”…
See what I did with the words, there?
If I have to explain it, people say it won’t be funny…
soooooo….
The first thing that came to my mind, trying to remember any Hysterical Events, was when Fabio got hit in the face by a passing bird, while riding a roller coaster in Vegas! That was funny, though I shouldn’t be laughing at another’s expense.
Ummmmm… what else?
ooooh oooooh! I got one, even though it never made the headlines.
When my husband and I first started RVing, we had to learn everything about that lifestyle, right fast and in a hurry! One of the first hurdles was gassing her up… the RV, that is.
I’d parked next to the fuel isle, and began observing my husband park our new home on wheels, in preparation for filling the gas tank. What happened next, was one of the most hilarious things I’ve ever seen!
I watched my husband step out of the RV and walk toward the fuel pump, only to then watch the RV begin to roll backwards, slowly following him along. He looked up at the RV as it passed him, before realizing it was outpacing him. Turning and running toward the door of the RV, it nearly ran him over as he stumbled frantically inside, just barely reaching the brake peddle before the RV hit the fuel station!
While, in that moment, I hadn’t been laughing, as I was in shock! However, once my brain caught up with my stomach, and realization dawned that the crisis had been averted… I nearly wet my pants laughing, as my husband’s white/red/green colored face reappeared from the RV’s swinging doorway. He took one look at my face through the car window, as I laughed myself silly… and then began to laugh, as well. We laugh about it, to this day!
I know that I’ve written a plethora of stories for everyone, regarding other knee slapping events, deep in the heart of my journey. If you are seriously looking for more hysterical events, my archives are there for your pleasure.
If you were at all wondering, yes, I’m well aware that the prompt asked about Historical Events, not Hysterical ones… I simply can’t come up with anything that wasn’t rather unpleasant to recall. With that in mind, I opted to go with my own goofy twist on things.
Here, have a cookie…
They’re hysterical!
Journey With Me! 