Personally, I would like to put in a request for one of those magic elevators like Willy Wonka owned!
It’s Sunday… the sun is shining in glorious warmth… I shall take my leave, to carry my cabin fever caboose out onto the trail nearby. For today, my cross-country trip is only 2 miles away, so I’ll be using my feet for mode of travel. The river is absolutely lovely right now, as the spring rains have it flowing high on its banks. I caught a glimpse of a duck floating in a sheltered pocket yesterday, so I’m going back today, hoping to see if she has any wee ones hidden in the reeds. Maybe I’ll get lucky and catch a picture of them, if I’m stealthy enough to approach within camera shot… wish me luck!
As you know, I’m currently reading through the book of Deuteronomy, which is where Moses did a great amount of teaching and recapping of the Israelites journey thus far. I’ll be honest in saying, at first, it made me feel like God sure was dumping a lot of rules and responsibility on these people, as well as many, many ceremonies calling for a ton of burnt offerings. How on earth can a person travel, work and survive on a daily basis, while living in obedience to God?
Directly on the heels of this thought, came the idea of comparing todays current global, national, and local Holidays and Laws. Let me tell you that it quickly became apparent that this is a rabbit hole, or more aptly put, a vortex of surfing dogs in Hawaii!
I was blown away at the sheer number of Holidays we currently recognize, both federally, as well as globally and culturally… I eventually stopped counting. We as a society can’t seem to help ourselves from assigning some form of importance to nearly every day of the year. I realize that this is probably a gross exaggeration, but come on… now we not only celebrate Mother’s Day, Receptionist Day, Valentines Day, but let’s now add on Woman’s Day too? What gives? Have we quite satisfied ourselves with enough pats on the back? This is just a single theme of Holidays that we annually roll out the carpet for, so if I broke down all of them, we’d be here til the cows came home!
While the sheer number of recognizable holidays was sinking into my brain, I switched gears a bit, to look at the comparison of laws given by God to the ones given us, currently, by our government… I didn’t have to look, to know we have easily surpassed God’s numbers! God gave us 10… and we can’t even follow those with any form of regularity. Our government is so lazy that instead of rewriting a law that is appropriate… they just add new ones, ignoring the ones that came before, in my humble opinion.
My point is, we may have come forward by several thousand years, but our human nature is still the same… it just looks different! We read through scriptures, or any other form of history writings, feeling appalled at the things that humans did in the distant past! Are we not still doing the same terrible things, simply changing the label that’s attached to that particular sin? Considering these things, for me anyway, is both eye opening and humbling!
Wisdom and discernment are the best rule of thumb, in regards to reading the scriptures, as a whole! It is always so easy to judge others, while looking on from a place of piety, assured that we would never behave as they did in our distant past. For crying out loud, we do that with each other… forget about thousands, hundreds, or even 20 to 30 years ago… we can’t help but crucify each other every other day of the week! I pray that you notice I’ve included myself in this assessment, as I am not above sinful behavior any more than you, or the Israelites.
What I am seeing though, through all of my reading, is a faithful God working tirelessly, with our best interest in His mind! This discovering of my own nature, within the pages of the Israelites story actually brings me a great amount of comfort. When Satan tries to plant seeds of shame and/or hopelessness in my mind, I’m so grateful to be reminded of Gods journey with the Israelites. He didn’t give up on them all those many generations ago, and I am comforted with His faithful presence to us, in the here and now. As far as obeying all the stiff laws, performing the many sacrifices and Holy Holidays to be recognized, I feel like Gods list is far easier for me to align with, than all the ones we’ve tried to come up with on our own. If I’m following His laws, obeying the earthly ones becomes much easier, almost as if their not even necessary.
In my humble opinion, I believe that the most confident person I can think of, would be anyone willing to carry the word of God out into the darkness.
While I have no confidence in myself, nor any other human that walks this earth, as none of us has shown anything I’m willing to write home about, I do hold complete confidence in the ONE who does have all the power… He has overcome the world, you know!
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”Winston Churchill
I shall let this picture fill in all the blanks, reflecting my thoughts regarding the Quote that I’ve used for todays Note To Self #29. Sometimes I simply talk too much, leaving no room for anyone else to share their feelings, so here you go… start typing.
The world offers many different strategies for coping with ones negative feelings, some choosing a therapist, while others choose meditation, music or any other form of relaxation one might find effective in the battle against the blues.
In my case, the therapist would themselves need therapy after I unload my struggles, and my brain is often running in overdrive, leaving meditation at the nearest rest stop. While I do listen to music every day as a part of my unbluing regime, the only true form of strategy I actively employ for wrangling any negative feelings, is writing!
You may be asking, what about prayer or reading Gods word? If you have fully read ANY of my writings, I pray it would be blatantly obvious, as to how much prayer and study time that went into the words found on the pages. If I’m not in constant prayer and continuously renewing my mind in God’s word, there would not be a writing for you to read, if that makes any sense.
I pray to my Creator, I read the living scripture He’s given me, and I speak His name as often as I can. This is done through my writing, as I do not happen upon actual people, from day to day, so my out loud conversations are usually only with HIM!
Why does this work so well for me, you ask? Well, many of my negative feelings actually come from loneliness and isolation, that’s why! Personally, no therapist can help here, unless they wish to become my friend and visit with some regularity… that means being my friend without getting paid for the effort!
At the heart of everything, the cause of anyone needing to have any strategies for coping with negative feelings… is not feeling loved! I’ve written time and again how important love is and how it should work. Again, I’m hoping you saw my operative word up above… I started that sentence with my own coping mechanism… I write. Writing not only helps me, but others as well, because every time I write for you, I’m trying to give you my love!
Whatever strategy you choose for your own coping with negative feelings, you’ll know it’s the right one for you, if it bears fruit in your life, as well as those you encounter!
It’s such a glorious day today, that all the babes have been begging me to take the boat down to the river for a floating picnic. Oddly, the most excited out of the whole bunch is Lilly. Our tiny new member has a deep love for floating, which is apparently how she ended up in our barn. She’d been playing among the dandelions, climbing up and inside the white fluffiness at the top of a stem, when a stiff breeze blew through the meadow, picking her up and carrying her and her fluff off on the wind.
Even though Lilly is bigger than any ant I’ve ever encountered, she is mostly fur, which is rather odd if you consider her to be from the Ant family. Anyway, this seems to be why she was so easily carried off on the breeze. When I asked her if she wished for us to return her to her family, Lilly exclaimed that she’d no home to return to, as the spring rains had flooded her families home and washed the entire colony away.
When she managed to find her way back to the anthill of her birth, there was nothing left… they’d all simply vanished! So my tiny friend once again climbed aboard her floating flower fluff, and took flight on the winds. When the winds calmed, the fluff she was holding onto landed upon the window sill of our barn.
Our tiny new friend seemed not to be in a hurry to go searching, as she explained how the ant network handled things like the lost and found. Apparently, her family knows exactly where she is, due to the colony that live near the barn. When I asked her how they would know such information, since she’d not left the barn since her fluff landed on the window sill, Lilly gave us our first lesson about ants. We learned that the local colony visit the barn every day to collect all the crumbs left over from the constant snacking that goes on around here.
I suppose that ants are rather useful, in regards to cleaning up food messes, but I still hold that they make terrible neighbors! They never ring before they come to visit, in fact, they don’t even bother with the doorbell. Not only do they show up at really inconvenient times, but they stay until the wee hours, helping themselves to whatever is available. Nothing is sacred if they think it’s edible, and they always invite their friends and family to join them, never once asking if we mind the added guest list.
As they’ve not yet attempted to overthrow us, nor devour us, I’ve called a sort of truce between the ants and myself, out of respect for my new friend. Maybe all my bad memories of ants was nothing more than cultural misunderstandings between neighbors. Though I’ve no idea where Lilly got her enormous ears and fur, she still belongs to the ant kingdom, so I want to be sensitive and respectful towards her family and her colony!
Though I would love to tell you more about Lilly and her family, I can hear all the babes outside my office, banging on the door and carrying on like sailors. I can hear them all shouting out things they think one might say on a ship, like “lower the Boomer” and silly things like that, as they know very little about boats. I can’t help but giggle, and part of me wants to sit here longer to listen for more ridiculous nautical words they attempt to create. Alas, the day is getting away from us, as it is, so I’m off to the river with my motley crew!
If we all make it back alive, I shall regale you with the tales of conquered kingdoms and whatever bootie we gathered. Keep a weathered eye out on the horizon for our return…
There was a time that I could lose myself in my children, my crafts, my pets, camping, church… and friends.
Times changed, however, bringing circumstances and life interruptus’ that, in one way or another, robbed me of the entire lot!
I will always cherish the memories, treasuring each and every moment of love given and time spent… but life goes on, and as they say, time waits for no man, or woman for that matter!
Admittedly, at no point in all those years did I fully walk with God! That has changed… thanks be to the grace offered by my heavenly father.
Currently, my days are filled with walks along the river, as I listen to music and fellowship with Him. I lose myself for hours in study of His written word, seeking the lifegiving wisdom within its pages. When I work on any of my literary work, I can easily forget to stop and eat, or even drink a full cup of coffee before it gets cold. It is normal for me to re-heat my coffee or tea repeatedly, before drinking the whole cup. My hubby actually has begun tapping me on the shoulder when I’ve gone too long without eating or drinking.
I believe that though we live day to day with very little, in terms of material things, I feel rather blessed with all the time God spends in molding this vessel. Thankfully, I’m so very lost in HIM, that there is nowhere else that I would rather be found…
It’s confession time! Maybe you noticed the lack of writing I’ve been doing of late… maybe not, but it has been for a very good reason. Over the past month I’ve been working on writing a book, but not the one you expect. Out of the blue last month, God asked me to set my planned novel aside, so as to finish something I’d been putting off for a while… my story.
Thanks to the repeated daily prompt questions about autobiographies, I realized that I’d been holding onto my unfinished story for far too long. The literary line was drawn, so I crossed over it, re-entering a God driven written story, that has been a long time coming.
As of yesterday afternoon, I’ve been staring at my first full work of writing! It has been exciting, terrifying, nauseating, stressful, blissful, exhausting and so very fulfilling! It is far from being seen on a shelf, I’m sure, but all the content is in there… all 40 some odd thousand words of it!
Now the work begins for this punctuation fairy, as I begin to do a full Audio Recording Editing session. I want to catch any unforeseen errors within the many pages, so listening to myself try to read it out loud, often reveals the problems rather easily. Once that’s done, all that’s left is to print my first copy for my own Poor Mans’ Copyright that I’ll mail to myself. My sweet husband went and found the cash to purchase a printer and some paper, so we keep rolling forward.
The rest is in God’s hands and though I am a ball of emotional energy over putting myself out there, I DID say a whole lot about what God has done, does, and will do… so I better walk the walk!
Never fear, for my main novel is not forgotten! In fact, it’s nearly two thirds of the way done, and beings that my mind is like a steel trap, there’s no chance that I will lose track of the finish line for that story. The thing I’ve told you from the beginning, was God ‘s instruction to me through all the struggle… just write! So I wrote! Now I have to finish what He encouraged me to start… all 5 books that I’ve been sitting on need to be completed, as they’re no good to anyone by simply sitting in files.
There is no telling, as to whether God will provide the funds for self-publishing or bring forth an Agent to assist in navigating the publishing world, but my husband is helping me researching both, as it is a bit daunting either way. Did you know that one book needs up to 5 separate USBN numbers for all the differing forms of releasing it? Ouch! But I serve a pretty big God, so I know things will go as He plans. This book is either hitting the shelves with God’s fingerprints all over it… or it can sit in the closet on a shelf, as far as I’m concerned.
While I realize that many people enjoy the electronic version for their reader apps, I feel rather strongly in the old school hardbound copy in ones hand, so we’ll do all 5 versions. My plan for the Audio version is to use my own voice, as it is my story, so I’m praying that whomever the publisher ends up being, they will at least listen to some recordings of my own voice for quality… I think I have a pretty good reading voice.
If I’m being completely honest with you, I do not fear people reading my goods, bads, and uglies… I struggle with the fear of not being capable of writing like the big dogs… silly, right? I also sometimes feel a bit like a drama queen, either oversharing or offending someone… I have insecurities just like everyone else does!
Oh well… there’s nothing to do but walk forward in faith towards that which I cannot see, but I believe is the path leading home…
I’ll be honest in saying that movies are more my thing, as far as binge watching anything over and over again. First of all I abhor commercials, so tv episodes usually only consist of about 18 minutes of show and 12 minutes of sales pitches on everything from toilet paper to cars! Secondly, I am not usually captivated enough by a television show, to watch it more than once… let alone more than 5 times.
That being said, I will confess that I’ve watched the Castle series more times than I wish to admit, but we purchased the series on DVD to alleviate all the bothersome commercials.
Now binge watching my favorite movies, on the other hand, is one of my guilty pleasures, as I am an avid insomniac with hours of nocturnal boredom. The list I’m about to give you, are my late night favorites, and the number of re-watches shall not be disclosed… but the number 5 is Childs play for this owl!
My ultimate go to, in the wee hours, is The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings… all of em!
Next up would be the Harry Potter series, but my most watched of that series has to be The Prisoner of Azkaban with Gary Oldman… great actor!
Then we have the entire series of Jurassic Park movies… the original will probably always be my favorite one, primarily due to them keeping it pretty close to the actual book.
Then there’s Tomb Raider… and Stargate… and of course, The entire line up of Pirates of the Caribbean, with Johnnie Depp. I absolutely love the entire cast of characters in each and every movie of this series.
If I were to list for you, every movie that I’ve watched too many times, we would be here til the cows come home, as they say. I will say this… we have a terabyte drive that holds over 600 movies and most of my favorites are on that drive, so there’s that…
Journey With Me! 