Category: babies

So, this morning I arrived at the barn early, hoping to get some writing done. When I opened the barn door, I was confronted with an entire loft, full of babes with paintbrushes and buckets of differing colored paint! I braced myself for the incoming bucket-sized paint bombs to land on me, but to my surprise, all the babes had a completely different plan in mind.

Apparently, they’d been waiting for me to arrive, in order to retrieve the eggs from the hen house. Boomer already tried to go in and take said eggs, but the chickens weren’t having any of it! They pecked the back of his head relentlessly, until he fled from their enclosure. He’s no worse for wear, as dragons have pretty tough skin, and I know with certainty, that Boomer has a hard head!

Quite honestly, I didn’t know the babes even wanted to decorate eggs for Easter, as I’ve been out of the egg painting business since my girls were small. I know that I’m always reading the bible to the barn babes, and yes, I did read the story of Easter to them only a few days ago; but I was momentarily confused, on how they knew about painting and hiding eggs.

That is, until I walked back into my office, to find that I’d left the door unlocked last night. They’d all been in here watching television all night on my laptop. With the holiday fast approaching, there are commercials about colored eggs and chocolate bunnies running nonstop!

After a lengthy session of explaining how chocolate is very bad for animals, we settled on a plan to color a large number of eggs, that would then be given back to the angry chickens. Once the eggs have been returned, I’ve agreed to hand out the honey coated granola clusters, that are always kept locked up in my office safe.

If you’re asking yourselves why I keep food locked up in a safe, just think about it for a moment. Nuts, honey, and oats vs. squirrels, dragons and mice… not to mention Lily, who is capable of calling in her ant relatives in a hot minute. I bet you thought it was easy to care for a barn filled with woodland babes. You’ve no idea!

Anyways, I’ve come inside to retrieve the granola, along with a basket for collecting the eggs, and I paused long enough to drop you this note. I’m off to gently persuade the ladies in the hen house to let us borrow their eggs for a bit. I wonder if when we paint the eggs, the colors will make the chicks arrive in a rainbow? I’ll get back to you later on this theory. I always use non toxic food-based dye, so it should be safe.

I do think it would be really funny, to see the mamma chickens faces, when their chicks come out looking like little Piñatas!

How does one begin talking about how they feel, when they really don’t want to have to talk about how they feel?

I shall begin by disclosing, in honesty, about how much getting older can suck! The last two weeks have been rather excruciating, as springtime weather patterns have been wreaking havoc on my back and joints. It’s made me grumpy, as well as, unable to sleep comfortably… at all!

I find it amazing, that a tiny thing such as chronic pain, can radically change a myriad of things. For starters, I don’t handle my life of isolation nearly as well as I normally can. Both Fibro and IBS start bellyaching about themselves, leaving me out of the conversation completely! I’m just left to clean up after their fits of anger and frustration. They are both pissed off at me, for being incapable of controlling the pain. Boo Hoo! They’re such big babies sometimes. If I could, I would kick them both out of my internal house! Unfortunately, we all just gotta get along and make nice with each other.

The biggest problem I face, while living in solitude, is over-thinking every aspect of my life and circumstances. I have endless hours each day, in which to analyze whether or not I’m doing this right, or that right. I can be my own worst enemy, overly criticizing myself in everything that I do, say, and yes, write! I get very irritated with how quickly I can lose faith in myself, just because I don’t feel well, or am feeling lonely. For crying out loud, I am the daughter of the Creator of the Universe! Why on earth should I feel lonely?

I think that’s the answer right there! We are created, not only in the image of God, but also designed like him, desiring love and fellowship. It is completely natural to need others. But, what do we do when there isn’t any OTHERS available? When I say others, I want to make it clear that I’m not talking about you all! I’m talking about my others! When I’m struggling with pain or illnesses, basically anything that makes me feel weak or unable to be self-sufficient, lack of being a part of a family unit hits me like a Mac truck! Add to that, I’m midway through editing my own memoirs, which requires me to go back through all the stories and letters of my past. While I know it needs doing, it still makes me feel overly emotional about most everything.

So much has been lost to me, mostly through my own mistakes. The biggest fear that hits me pretty hard, is that my girls will never read the book I’m writing, once it’s finished. Oh, I’m still going to publish it, of that I feel confident. But will they ever overcome their hurt and anger? I live about 20 minutes away from all three of my girls, but my door has not seen them in front of it for years. My oldest disowned me, my middle child pretends that she’s just busy, and I’m not even welcome in my youngest daughters home. My mother has passed, my brother has passed, my sister wants nothing to do with me, and my foster family betrayed my trust. The church turned their back on me, after my divorce, as well as, nearly every friend I thought was mine. My phone lays quiet, my doorway empty! I physically see no more than two people I know, on a regular basis… that’s it! I cannot drive yet, as I’ve not been able to renew my drivers license since my eye surgeries. We haven’t had a flushing toilet since November, nor hot water, but thankfully there’s a bathroom in the RV Park. For each of these issues, there is at least 3 or 4 more that I’ve not the time or energy to share about.

When I’m feeling well, I could care less about these things… but when I’m in pain, all bets are off and I get hit from all sides. Why am I telling you all of this? Because, sometimes I think it’s better to call myself out on a thing, so as to let the air out of its inflated self!

Everyone has troubles or hardships at times, that’s life! In honesty, I feel better when I write my feelings out to you, whether you know it or not! You all get to see me at my best… and at my worst! I know it’s my choice to share so openly and publicly, but come on… you’re all I got, aside from God, and He’s the one that told me to share with you. For what it’s worth, you really do make me feel loads better, from even the smallest like or smiley emoji you send. You make me feel seen, like maybe I’m not invisible! Thank You!

I’ll feel better soon, as the weather will adjust, and then you won’t have to read so many grumpy posts. May God richly bless each and every one of you, for the words of love and encouragement, as well as prayers given on my behalf! Again, Thank you!

Hugs from the grumpy girl!

Sometimes, when the storm seems too great to withstand, all you really need is someone standing with you, helping you hold on…

I’m still undecided about what I want to do with Tuesdays! I enjoy both of the styles of writing, but do not get a big response out of either series like I’d first hoped.

Both of the series were supposed to play out as independent short stories, with one leaving insights and the other leaving questions to be answered. I am discovering that people are just too busy with lives and challenges of their own, to engage in much back and forth conversation. I’m not judging, rather, I’m being a realist about my expectations of others.

On an average day, most people wish to stop in and grab a cookie, taking a few moments to read whatever is laying upon the table in the Lobby. It’s a lot to ask for someone to stick around longer than that, as life’s highway is going at breakneck speed… no one has much available free time to invest in something or someone outside of their busy lives. I think this is why they created the like button on our feeds, as it’s sort of like a get out of jail free card for most. I get it! I have a large number of subscribers that I attempt to support, just as they support my site, sometimes having to skim the surface of their entries and leave a like, to offer them encouragement. It’s not easy to connect with everyone, and I’ve got nothing but time on my hands!

In order to cut myself some slack, as well as everyone else, I shall simply write what I think works for that day… minus any inquiring questions. It may be poetry you see, or possibly a short story of some kind. Perhaps I will feel musical, or even nostalgic in some literary form, sharing stories from long ago. The point is, I will write whatever seems fitting for the day, leaving you to come and go without feeling like you need to respond.

Writing to you should be a way for me to give love and encouragement to anyone and everyone, without expecting anything in return. I’m just grateful that you stopped by the Lobby.

Well, I’m back from playing hooky all last week… Did ya miss me??? I can’t tell you how hard it was to stay away, even though I was having a fantastic time with my better half!

Sometimes, even though we love what we do, if we don’t take the time to breathe and rest once in a while, things begin to suffer. The quantity of our work might be there, but the quality starts to drop dramatically! A body can only take so much before it uses up all its reserves, thereby starting to lose effectiveness! You, my family, deserve better from this ole girl!

I’m back on my game, I think, so here’s the deal… I’m keeping Monday Messages because it’s my chance to personally say hello to everyone! I like to give you heads up about what the week might look like, as well as, checking in with you about how you’re doing. Mondays are a great time to chat about our weekend, plus you get an opportunity to ask or answer questions… I think that’s what family is supposed to do.

I have a dilemma about what Tuesday should be, as I’m torn between writing episodes of The Wharf or episodes of Tuesday Tattler. This is where you come in, because I could use your input on what you enjoy. Let me know if you want one or the other… or if you want me to split them, writing one every other week.

Wednesdays will still be sort of a poetic and/or quirky word play day.

Thursday is my personal day of writing to you about things of current happenings in my world. I like to keep this as my personal perspective day, so as to show you who I really am… real world style!

Fridays have turned into my Barnyard play/work day! You guys and gals make the creating of my tiny compadres what it is… fun! I am looking for your feedback, on whether putting a box on that page for buying me a cup of coffee, is a good thing or a bad thing. I am horrible at asking for help, but I believe that the babes deserve to be in the hands of little future grown ups, bringing joy and laughter to whomever reads their stories. Let me know what you think, as I’ve no intention of doing it, unless your response reflects a positive attitude. This will NOT be a GoFundMe anything! If you don’t want to give, don’t give… don’t even bother with that page on my site. I write everything you read here for free, as you are my friends and family, not customers or clients! Okay, I said it… there! No more talk about that!

This last week was our last Note To Self, but I’ve a new and exciting series for Saturdays called As They Say, which I think everyone is going to love!

Sunday will stay Live Wire, simply because I love reading the word and talking with absolutely anyone who wants to listen to my thoughts and new insights.

Ok… I commit to you, that I won’t make Monday Messages this long every week. I’m just so rested and raring to go, it’s made me a bit chatty this morning. I will end things here on a positive note, praying God blesses each and every one of us this week!