(March 2023) Hey Bob

So, here is a funny story!  I love the outdoors and if I can help it, I am out there as much as possible.  I make an effort to take a walk nearly every day, and I have a route that I have used for some time now.  I do a good amount of thinking on these morning jaunts, as I call them.  Sometimes it can be very productive, but at other times, I let my mind just wander to relax.  On one of these such relaxing mornings, I hatched a plan, that in my mind, would be very funny to any that were involved.  I have a great many squirrels that I encounter on a regular basis, and I was going to recruit them for this idea.

I came up with a plan to simply begin saying hello, out loud, to every squirrel I encountered and give each a random name, as if I actually know them.  I thought that if I did this, eventually, the passersby that frequently saw me, would begin to think that maybe I knew the squirrels.  I could simply wait for the time when someone would stop me to ask how I knew all of the squirrels names, and I could then say, “Oh no, I have no idea, I just thought it would be funny”. I didn’t say that it WOULD be funny, I just imagined it would be funny.

The next morning, I headed out onto the trail, thoroughly tickled with myself, for what I thought would be an extremely funny idea.  Honestly, I giggled to myself all the way down the block as I began looking for my first unwitting participant (a squirrel, that is).  I got about a half hour into my trek, playing over and over in my head how it would play out, and then I spotted a squirrel.

I learned two things that morning.  Number one, I discovered that, apparently, a lot of squirrels share the name Bob.  Number two, Peanuts!  I should have brought peanuts.  My recommendation is that we not engage in conversation with wildlife, unless we bring some sort of food offering.  I think someone else may have been conditioning these guys way before I ever thought up my ridiculous idea!

Here is how it went down…I saw the squirrel, I approached confidently, thinking how funny this was gonna be, I called out, “Hey Bob”, and before I knew it I was being chased down the trail by three hungry squirrels.  I felt like it happened in slow motion…lol…I spoke, our eyes connected, they looked hungry, I had nothing but a coffee tumbler and a tissue, Coffee over Heathens I say!   I did not care how absolutely ridiculous I must have appeared to onlookers.  I actually think I may have laughed out loud at myself, but I did not care!  I walked a different route for two days after that to let them forget me hopefully.

I still see the same three squirrels on the trail regularly, and the accusation is still there on those furry little faces… Where Are OUR Peanuts!!!!

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